Saturday, April 10, 2010

Mars Needs Paper Towels

Scene: The kitchen. "Mom" (enthusiastically played by me) dramatically unravels a paper towel wad left by her son, Miles (played with spunk, charm, and sarcasm by Miles, himself) and exclaims:

Mom: You've GOT to be kidding me! Let's count them: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 squares of paper towel to dry your hands. Wow.

Miles: (sheepishly) Oops. . . sorry! But I needed them, my hands were really wet.

Mom: (not buying what this little matchstick peddler is sellin' and just having recently balanced the checkbook) Do you know how wasteful this is? How much money paper towels cost? No wonder I'm going through so many! USE ONE!

Miles: (gaining confidence) Well, fine. . .

Mom: (ready to really drive the point home) I mean, I thought you cared about OUR PLANET! It's the only one we've got, you know.

Miles: (gaining too much confidence): Yeah, well, there's Mars. We could just live there.

Mom: (thinking, Oh, I'll see you one nerdy remark and I'll raise you one nerdy science fiction teacher): Mars doesn't sustain life.

Miles: (exponentially nerdifying the conversation) Well, we can discover a way to sustain life on Mars. . . the technology exists. . . we're close to figuring it out.

Mom: (won't be conned out of making her point) We won't have time to figure it out because we're all too busy buying paper towels!



  1. Admit it Lisa, if life IS sustainable on Mars, Miles will figure it out. This is the kid that we sat around googly-eyed, listening to him tell us about all the planets at age 2.

    But keep up with the good fight.

  2. Miles need to learn that he can't out nerd you! You wrote a science fiction class! You love Lost! You read I, Robot! His nerdy genes come from you.

  3. I just really wanted him to know that I can out nerd him. Topher is in the other room dying a little inside.

  4. Next time you're upset with him, tell him to go find the black hole at the center of the galaxy.

  5. It's funny, because people always think I'm the nerdy one. I'm really not that nerdy. Miles is basically Lisa in my body.

  6. Once he settles on Mars he'll have to buy his own paper towels - THEN he'll get what you were saying.

  7. "...exponentially nerdifying the conversation..." :)

    (that is an awesome phrase!) :D